Friday, October 30, 2015


Here I am again....
Six years later....
Three babies later...
That is what I have been doing.

It has been intense.  Ministry and Church issues, Church planting struggles, then stepping away for a season.  

A season of so many little children. Focus on our family was good.
Then God called again and we followed... trust and obey. Always so hard.

God strengthened and blessed us in so many areas. This last two years has been the best yet.  I've learned how to manage our family well and Mike works so hard to provide, he is selfless... well, most of the time. I constantly fight to find joy. While I have learned how to manage well, I have also morphed into more of a manager than a compassionate mother, I feel.  I want to love more. I want to love better.  I was telling Mike last night that I feel as if I don't touch the boys very much.  The older they get the less touch.  I know it is because the needs are much less and they are almost self sufficient in so many way. But I miss touching them each more.  Hug them three times a day to feed their souls should be a rule to live by.
Our marriage is amazing.  We are in love again. It is amazing to have butterflies again and not just coexist/co-manage. I love to kiss him and I love to love him.

Ministry has been amazing. Each one of us has found a place to plug in, be fed and to feed others. Being able to minister with Mike in worship has been amazing. Like God remembered a dream that I thought He had forgotten. And God has given us new dreams.  Sometimes it seems impossible and I am so curious how He is going to bring it all to pass if they are truly dreams from Him.
Things are shaky now, but we rest in knowing that God is Sovereign and He will do what He plans to do. That is usually different than I ever imagine. To know His Father heart for me causes me to trust, deep trust. 

Sunshine and rain. Hard to really explain a name, but I just heard it.  The longer I think about it the more it makes sense. The beauty of the rays of sunshine coming in the window in the late afternoon. The beauty of the rain, hard downpours or light sprinkles, scary at times but you know there is a purpose.  The amazing beauty of sunshine through a hard rain... I am a Florida girl. And of course, a rainbow is only found in sunshine and rain. I think that I am having a revelation as to how my Father works though it all.  My eyes are beginning to open.... as I find Him, I find myself.