Thursday, February 4, 2016

adjusting in the sovereignty of God

I am struggling to keep up here so I will just spill my heart with this week.

I seem to be struggling with everything going on right now.  Battling a bit of depression in some areas.  Nothing big, just adjusting.  I want to choose joy more.  I don't want to miss these moments.

Mike has been working with Cornerstone for two weeks now. We are anticipating all the struggles financially, before he gets going strong.  That stress is definitely there, but I do feel at peace.  I know the Lord will bring us through it.

His schedule is different each day, so that has my mornings off a bit.  I am not sure if he will every have a perfectly scheduled day.  That is different for me.  Letting go of the control that I have to keep on the day before the crazy starts.  Oh, these boys...
I do look forward to more help from him, but also hope that I don't get disappointed if it doesn't work out exactly how I anticipate it.

Yesterday was a huge day.  Gideon had an appointment with the cardiologist to go over the results of his tests on Tuesday.  The doctor came in with some small talk asking about Gideon and listening to his heart. Then finally said, "well, the asd closed." Oh, what relief! While I was waiting, I was at peace, but feeling like I could still be shocked with the worst kind of news.   Oh, the Lord is so good to us!  I know the peace was there because of all the things He has brought us through.  While the steps may be hard, He is always there.  I knew it would be no different if we had to walk the road of heart surgery.  I trust His heart and His intentions.  Knowing He would guide even if we did have to walk through many shadows. So amazing to say.  I want to love my Lord so much more deeply.  He keeps drawing me in.

His ways is always perfect.

Knowing His healing hand has been on Gideon helps me to rest.  He is here.  He will not forsake and He will not let us be put to shame.

Our desire is for His glory.

Thank You, my Jesus.